From: lbrunasso@aol.com
Date: August 7, 2014 at 2:04:53 PM EDT
To: marksztanyo
Subject: At last I found my true calling
Date: August 7, 2014 at 2:04:53 PM EDT
To: marksztanyo
Subject: At last I found my true calling
1. My first job was working in an
Orange Juice factory, but I got canned. Couldn't concentrate.
2. Then I worked in the woods as a
Lumberjack, but just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
3. After that, I tried being a Tailor,
but wasn't suited for it--mainly because it was a sew-sew job.
4. Next, I tried working in a Muffler
Factory, but that was too exhausting.
5. Then, tried being a Chef - figured
it would add a little spice to my life, but just didn't have the thyme.
6. Next, I attempted being a Deli
Worker, but any way I sliced it.... couldn't cut the mustard.
7. My best job was a Musician, but
eventually found I wasn't noteworthy.
8. I studied a long time to become a
Doctor, but didn't have any patience.
9. Next, was a job in a Shoe Factory.
Tried hard but just didn't fit in.
10. I became a Professional Fisherman,
but discovered I couldn't live on my net income.
11. Managed to get a good job working
for a Pool Maintenance Company, but the work was just too draining.
12. So then I got a job in a Workout
Center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job.
13. After many years of trying to find
steady work, I finally got a job as a Historian - until I realized there was no
future in it.
14. My last job was working in
Starbucks, but had to quit because it was the same old grind.
15. SO, I TRIED RETIREMENT AND I FOUND
I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB!
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
From: randy Brown <captainbeach@gmail.com>
Date: August 5, 2014 at 12:20:35 PM EDT
Subject: New watch?
Date: August 5, 2014 at 12:20:35 PM EDT
Subject: New watch?
A very
confident Navy Pilot (is there another kind?) walks into a bar and takes a seat
next to a very attractive woman.
He gives her a quick glance then casually
looks at his watch for a moment. The
woman notices this and asks, "Is your
date running late?" No," he
replies, "I just got this state-of-the-art
watch, and I was just testing it."
The intrigued woman says, "A
state-of-the-art watch? What's so
special about it?" The Pilot says, "It
uses alpha waves to talk to me
telepathically." The lady says, "What's it
telling you now?" Well, it says
you're not wearing any panties...." The
woman giggles and replies, "Well
it must be broken because I am wearing
panties!" The Fighter Pilot
smirks, taps his watch and says, "Damn thing's
an hour fast."
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Must See!
From: Wbrindell@aol.com
Sent: 8/6/2014 10:17:37 A.M. Central Daylight Time
Subj: Fwd: Subject: Fatal wing suit flight in Rio
Sent: 8/6/2014 10:17:37 A.M. Central Daylight Time
Subj: Fwd: Subject: Fatal wing suit flight in Rio
Another
wingsuit skydiver dies. Its unbelievable what these guys will try.
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