From: George Chaudoin
Date: 10/02/13 11:48:30
Subject: An Obituary printed in the London
Times.....Absolutely Brilliant
On The Green Side
George
An Obituary printed in the London Times.....Absolutely Brilliant !!
Today
we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense ,
who
has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure
how
old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red
tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
-
Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
-
Why the early bird gets the worm;
-
Life isn't always fair;
-
And maybe it was my fault.
Common
Sense lived by simple,
sound
financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable
strategies
(adults, not children, are in charge).
His
health
began
to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations
were
set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment
for
kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after
lunch;
and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened
his
condition.
Common
Sense lost ground when
parents
attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to
do
in disciplining their unruly children.
It
declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to
administer
sun
lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a
student
became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common
Sense lost the will to
live
as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better
treatment
than their victims.
Common
Sense took a beating
when
you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the
burglar
could sue you for assault.
Common
Sense finally gave up
the
will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of
coffee
was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a
huge
settlement.
Common
Sense was preceded in death,
-by
his parents, Truth and Trust,
-by
his wife, Discretion,
-by
his daughter, Responsibility,
-and
by his son, Reason.
He
is survived by his 5 stepbrothers;
-
I Know My Rights
-
I Want It Now
-
Someone Else Is To Blame
-
I'm A Victim
-
Pay me for Doing Nothing
Not
many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
From: Dick Deeds <dickdeeds@pacbell.net>
Date: August 22, 2013, 5:06:24 PM EDT
To: undisclosed-recipients:;
Subject: Johnathon Winters as an Airline PIlot
Date: August 22, 2013, 5:06:24 PM EDT
To: undisclosed-recipients:;
Subject: Johnathon Winters as an Airline PIlot
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